On Tuesday, after two days of naps and nothingness, I decided it was time to do some laundry. I started a pile and then remembered an email I needed to check so I opened up my laptop. There was a new email (not the one I was looking for) that said “Channel 4 News Story.” What news story was someone sending meee….ohhh noooo….
It was from a producer at CBS Boston who had read about I Am More: Massachusetts in the Worcester Telegram. He asked if I could be at the exhibit at 12. Today. I sat down on my piles of laundry at examined the message. Worcester was 90 minutes away on a good day, I had no clean clothes, a chiropractor’s appointment, no gas in the car, unwashed hair, I barely owned any makeup…so I called the voice of reason. Iain answered and I explained this impossible situation. He replied, “You have to do it.” I replied that maybe I could do it on a different day when I had more time to prepare. He said I could ask, but it was likely that it was now or never. I called the producer and…it was now or never, the news doesn’t wait, although 1:30 was doable. And could I also get a portrait subject there to be interviewed?
I started texting as frantically as my middle-aged thumbs could manage. The gallery – check – they would be ready; a portrait subject – check – Ryan M would be there. The car/gas – check – Iain would pick me up.
I raced to Dr. Elizabeth Bish’s office for my last appointment for a shoulder injury, ran to the parking pay station, opened my wallet and…no quarters. Ran back to the car and searched every compartment and found enough for a half hour. Ran into the office, scribbled on the sign-in sheet, handed over my debit car and…declined. Tried again…declined. Called Iain (just a reminder here that Iain is the CEO of a non-profit, managing a staff, expeditions, fundraising, speaking engagements, a boat, a headquarters under restoration, and he still finds time to calm me in any situation) who reminded me that there was probably cash in my wallet. Dr. Bish massaged and cracked and sent me on my way.
The next twenty minutes were spent ripping clothes off their hangers looking for something without wrinkles, dog hair, stains, then I raided Dylan’s room for left-behind makeup. Oh, thank god, a concealer…empty. Oh, okay, a foundation in my color, that would do…EMPTY. WHY WAS THIS CHILD KEEPING EMPTY BOTTLES OF MAKEUP??? I grabbed a bottle of too-dark foundation and threw it in a bag, microwaved two burritos, ran the dog around the yard, made a triple-strength calming tea and jumped in the car.
Conjuring up any makeup knowledge I could recall from my past life as a makeup artist, I smeared face cream all over my face, and started attempting to blend the too-dark foundation. Apparently years of lazy skincare and a lack of exfoliation will leave you with a patina of flaky dead skin which is enhanced by tan, matte foundation. Iain, peacefully driving, did not realize the crisis that was unfolding next to him. I starting picking and rubbing, slathering on more cream, which all amounted to orange blobs smearing around my face. I looked in my bag, found my lip balm, and in a final act of desperation, smeared it all over my face, took my hankie out of my purse and scrubbed with the balm until my face was silky smooth…and now angry red. Later, I told Dylan my story. “Oh yeah,” she replied, “that foundation is at least five years old.”
The actual shoot went fairly smoothly with only a couple of hiccups…my mind occasionally going blank with terror, and a chihuahua peeing a lake in the middle of the gallery. Luckily Ryan M was eloquent enough for the both of us, and other than getting the name of the exhibit wrong, we ended up with a very sensitively-handled, well-shot piece which you can view here.
In other news, Ramani wrote a book! I ran into him recently and he said he had published a book and it happened to be about “I Am More.” I haven’t read it yet, but I think he means how he is more. The book launch for Gathering Moments in Time: Adventures of a Timeless Traveler is this Sunday October 27th from 5:30-7:30 at the Rocky Neck Cultural Center at 6 Wonson Street in Gloucester. We will be there!
I Am More is supported by donations. I have $15,165 left of my goal to bring I Am More: Massachusetts to the public. If you would like to make a tax-deductible contribution you can go to the Donation page of our fiscal sponsor Ocean Alliance and choose “I Am More” from the list of programs.Thank you for your support!!